The humor in politics

One of the best things I have come to enjoy the most about politics is the volume of comedic material that it generates. And even better, it stretches across party lines. This is especially true during a presidential election when the candidates are working 18 hours a day speaking in hundreds of engagements, meeting 1000's of people, getting very few hours of sleep. It is only inevitable that they stumble periodically, making great comedic opportunities. SNL has made a living off of political humor and have really struck gold with the Tina Fey / Palin spoof. (#1, #2, #3). We are on the eve of yet another SNL episode so I am sure that will be classic.

But do we really need comics to find humor in politics? I would vote "Nay". I came across this video on YouTube and after watching it, I am sure you will agree. Enjoy!

Fathers

I don't remember much about my biological father. I see him as an old faded Polaroid, an apparition from the past. He was the gloved hand of a thief that left no fingerprint... I am not sure what happened back then to split my family apart and it is probably irrelevant at this point. I don't hold any resentment, although I do have a hard time understanding how someone can walk away from their children. There is not much more to say about him.

So, this post is focused on my step-father, the one who in my mind holds the title of father for me. My early memories are pretty sketchy, which I am sure doesn't surprise the folks who know me well. One of the earliest memories I have of my father was him coming into my room late at night and telling me that he had been very lenient on me, but now it was time that he start acting like a father. I didn't understand what he meant at the time, but soon found out that it meant a regimen of labor, rules, and obedience. He was an intimidating and imposing man, so you didn't disagree or talk back, you just took your medicine.

Looking back, I was clearly the "step-child". I remember nights of praying and tears, hoping for a time where we could be the typical father and son duo. The time never came. The few times we did interact was mostly when I was of an age where I could work for him. At the age of 12 or 13, I was put to work at his job sites, cleaning up houses, clearing construction debris from golf courses, sweeping office buildings, and the like.


In high school, his behavior became even more erratic and his rules outlandish - DUIs, arrests, drinking on the job. His rules: Your teeth should never touch your fork or spoon when eating, your hands must be above the table when you pray before eating, entering the house must be followed by an appropriate greeting to the father, no sleeping past 9am, and I am sure dozens more that I have long forgotten. His arrival from work often exceeded 9 or 10pm if we saw him at all and when he was in the house, you could feel the tension in the air like a thick fog blanketing the house. The fighting was both unavoidable and never ending and he regularly blamed me for causing the marital problems. I dreaded report cards because it was always followed by long demeaning lectures and groundings. Near the very end, it escalated to a brief episode of violence. My mother, always the savior, made the hard decision to send me to Lubbock to live with my older sister a few months before attending college.

But the purpose of this post is not give a sob story, nor condemn my father, but rather embrace the experience. I have come to the conclusion that bad things happen in life for a reason as part of a greater plan. They represent challenges that test your perseverance, faith, and fortitude. For every arduous time, there is always something to be learned and how you respond helps define you as a person, for better or worse. So, the remainder of this post's purpose is to give my father some post-mortem forgiveness and praise. You see, even through all the difficulties, the fights, the anger, and resentment, there was good in him. He was a man who was inflicted with a horrible disease that he could not overcome. It was a disease that he eventually paid the final price for. It wasn't readily apparent to me at the time, nor did I have any revelations after I went off to college, but rather it wasn't until several years later I started to reflect on the positive influences he did have in my life. At his foundation, beyond the addiction, he held some fundamental values that I was extremely fortunate to have him pass on to me. For that, I am eternally grateful. I only hope I can do the same and pass these on to my children and I will list them here:

Value of hard work

Hard work helps you appreciate the little things in life and prepares you for the times in life that don't come easy. It takes endurance and dedication to get through the bumps in the road of life. And the best part of hard work is that harder you work, the more you enjoy the fruits of your labor. That is probably why I enjoy punishing myself so much when I go hiking. There is no better feeling than climbing to the top of a pass after 3 straight days of hiking, or reaching a breathtaking scenic overlook of the west Texas desert land after an all day hike in 100 degree heat.

Take Pride in Your Work and Do It Right the First Time

When you do something, do it 100%. This will help you go a long way in life as well in a career. I can't tell you how many things I thought were trivial in my job but turned out to be significant keystones to advancement within my career... A presentation I put together for an executive leadership summit, the small "low value" project team I lead, an application I wrote in my spare time.. sometimes it is the little things that get you noticed and it has proven to be extremely valuable to do these "little things" to the best of your ability because you never know who will be watching and what impression you will be setting.

Impression Setting

There were a lot of things in this category but I have named just a few below. It has always baffled me that these things work, but I guess it goes to show you how important the first impression is (and how superficial people can be sometimes!)

• When you give a hand shake, be firm.
• 
  Always look a man in his eyes when you speaking to him or listening to what he has to say
• Listen, think, then speak. If you do it out of order, you'll probably be putting your foot in your mouth more often than not.
• Dress for the job you want, not the job you have

Take responsibilities for your actions

This is a big one for me. It makes me sick when people blame the government, their parents, peer pressure, or authority figures for decisions that made and had absolute control over. Everyone makes poor choices sometimes so just own up to it, learn from the experience and move on. You'll never grow as a person if you continue to rely on others to make decisions for you or show you how to live your life. It is this reluctance of some people to admit wrongdoing that forms the root of so much human turmoil. An unforgiving, unrepentant nature, whether among individuals, families, communities or nations, is responsible for misconceptions that lead to animosity and hatred.

I am sure there are more lessons I have learned, but this blog is getting pretty long so I think I'll wrap up. I am not sure if they have the internet in the afterlife.. but Dad, if you are reading, thank you for giving me character, perseverance, appreciation, and integrity. I am forever in your gratitude and I hope you have finally found peace from your demons.

$700,000,000,000 rant from a simple man

Ok, I'd like to take a moment to rant. So, we are in the middle of a pretty significant financial crisis, some of which is pretty complicated but I get the gist of it:

1. Rampant increase of sub-prime lending for home ownership, partially due to the US HUD mortgage policies and other incentives to increase home ownership. Fannie and Freddie are wrapped up in the mix providing very high risk loans because they have the US government backing them (partial ownership). Other mortgage companies follow suit, often with low initial interest rates that balloon after a few years. High availability of loanable funds and lax restrictions on sub-prime lending cause lots and lots of high-risk loans.
   
   Translation: Lots of people own houses that they can't really afford.
   
   
2. Investment firms jump in on the action through a process called securitization where these mortgages are bought up, packaged, and offered as collateral to 3rd party investors. Now, the details of this process are pretty fuzzy to me, but it seems that everybody makes money in this deal as long as housing prices continue to rise and people continue to pay their mortgages. No reason that won't happen, right?
   
   Translation: The financial sector is playing the hot potato with mortgages.
   
   
3. The price of oil skyrockets, followed by food and fuel. The cost of living rises faster than the average income.
   
   Translation: Everything gets more expensive.
   
   
4. Housing market takes a tumble. Prices fall dramatically. Now those who can't afford their houses (nor gas, food, etc.), also can't refinance because their house is worth less now then when the first bought it. No one will buy their house because there is a housing surplus, thus eventual foreclosure. The more foreclosures, the more surplus of houses in the market, the lower the prices fall.
   
   Translation: Bub-bye home.
   


5. A number of large investment firms, not following their own advice of diversifying their portfolio, were significantly leveraged in the mortgage-backed securities market. De-regulation on the amount of debt investment firms could hold and the riskiness of their investments didn't help. The majority of their profits (and losses) were tied directly to the housing market and when that crashed, so did they.
   
   Translation: Bottom fell out. Big guys tumbled.
   
   
6. Now everyone is in a panic seeing all these large investment firms fall, causing stock holders to selling their assets at a pace comparable to what was seen after the attack of 9/11. "Sell, Sell, Sell" is heard globally. Anyone who had anything in the market lost big. I am still scared to see what is left of my 401k.
   
   Translation: No retirement for you Bob. No college for you Jimmy.
   


7. Everyone gets scared and hoards there money. No trips to Jamaica. No new car. Mac and Cheese for dinner instead of Outback steak house. Now other companies completely unrelated to mortgages or investment firms are feeling the pinch and are forced to reduce cost and overhead so that they can weather the storm. Many are spending their mornings in the unemployment line.
   
   Translation: No customers = no profit = cut costs = layoffs
   

Ok, so here we are, hours after the largest government bailout in history, $700 billion approved to buy up troubled assets from banks, and I am still scratching my head and trying to figure it out. Seems like an awful lot of taxpayer money to dig folks who made a lot of poor decisions out of a hole, but I guess I will leave that up the the economists to figure out.

But what REALLY chaps my hide are some of the smaller print items around this. For instance:

• "Limiting compensation to executives of the failing companies".
  
  LIMITING??? What? I am pretty sure that if, in the course of my job, I managed to lose several billion dollars causing my company to go under, they would not be sending me packing with a compensation plan. I'd probably be in court being prosecuted for fraud. Why in the world would we reward these guys for anything for poor judgement? Oy...
  
  
• "Treasury Secretary will have the power to take depressed securities backed by credit card debt and auto loans off banks' hands."
  
  Woah, now. Wait a minute. I have been busting my hump for years getting rid of credit card debt, working overtime and late nights, kissing up to this boss and that boss. Now because a few folks defaulted on mortgages, I have the honor to pay for others credit card and auto loan debts? I am having a hard enough time trying to figure out why I am paying for people buying houses they cant afford and now you are telling me I have to pay for their car, their Wii, and their trip to Florida too? Sweet.
  
  America, please put the "Pre-Approved Credit Card" application down!
  
  
• "Bailout Bill Laden with Earmarks"
  
  Hrmm.. Ok, so $700 billion is not enough to put into the hands of the treasury secretary to right the sinking ship that you need to add earmarks to it? Well, let me read them with an open mind. Perhaps they are legit, or somehow related to the bailout:

That's it. I quit. It's Friday and I am starting to feel VERY thirsty..... ;-)